So a LOT has been happening! Revelations, energy shifts, life shifts, growing etc. so much and I will fill in some holes but let’s talk about today and firmly shutting the door on one part of my life.
Remember that show Mad about You? well there was one episode where a line that has been in my memory for 12 myears or more came from. The line? “Women need closure”. I am one of those women and I also cling to the familiar. I’ve always had amicable break ups too. Get the picture? So when I was laid off my boss who also doesn’t do closure well, let me keep my keys and hadn’t pressured me to pack up my things and get them out. But now 5 months later the companies moving and I had to get my stuff out. But here’s where God comes into the picture.
As I said things are happening. the biggest is that a publisher is reviewing my novel. In Doreen Virtue’s Archanel Oracle card deck there is an “All is well” Archangel Raguel Card. In a nutshell it talks about how often things can seem chaotic or seem to be going “wrong” but God must diamntle the old to make room for the new. And this is what God has been demonstrating to me over and over again. So in my mind and spirit, I’ve been cinging to my old job to some extent. Even though with each day I realize how unhealthy it was, how dysfunctional etc. When little things would come up as potential work through them for example I’d think “OK, this is good I can stay connected, but not go back there”. Uh…so why did I feel the need to stay connected? I have no clue! comfort? familiarity? all I know is that a few days ago it hit me. that if I wanted to move on with my life I had to permanently shut the door on that part of my life.
So today when I picked up my boxes, I gotta tell you, I was so happy! 10% emotional and 90% jubilant! i left my keys on the main desk and felt giddy. Talk about closure – SLAM! Woo hoo!!! I’m free. And the world is wide open. REM’s song was in my head the entire time. So yeah, it’s the end of the world as we know it but let me tell you, I feel way fine, because, to use yet another song lyric, from a gospel song sung by the Richard Smallwood Singers… “I have come too far. I have come too far. I’ve come too far to turn around, a higher place I’ve found; this I know: I’m going to make it. I can’t turn back now.” Amen.
Divine Guidance: The Practicum 